I can't pretend and I will not!

This is pretty random but it was being kept inside me for a really long time, so I might as well let it all out now...since I'm in the mood. ^^

Sometimes I do wonder if I'm being paranoid. Is she really such a threat to me? I can't be mad at her all the time, but I just can't stand the fakeness in her that really makes me wanna slap or curse her. People tend to fall prey to her all the time, trust me, I never knew that she was like that when I first knew her. She's really good at it! Since so much have happen, I think my judgment towards her will not be fair anymore. Whatever things she does, it seems to be a hatred to me.

There were much controversy over certain things these few months, and I'm thanking God that it's coming to an end in a few weeks time. Though I still fear of what may lie in the future, but I have no control of it.

Forgive her? Friends? Yeah...on the outer layer, we are indeed friends. Within us, we know very well that there is a wide gap between both of us. Saying that it's all over? Nah...it's all bullshit. If it's all over, she wouldn't have so much grudges over me. I can see and feel it in the way she look at me, so...She treat me differently from others, so what do you expect me to do? Sometimes it's just so hard for us to communicate that I would rather not talk. I can't pretend and I will not pretend. I just don't get it how can others still talk when there's already a gap there? Sigh...am I abnormal?

No doubt that I might still be angry with her. I still feel that she is being darn ridiculous with all her selfish reasons. I still feel that she doesn't have the right to control and know about other people's life. What's her problem? I seriously don't know and I don't understand as well.

Oh well, just a few more weeks and I'm done. I'm through with it...Take Care people~!